Just found the site tonight, so far everything I’ve found is really hitting home.
Hats off to those responsible.

This is a very profound observation and one that hits close to home. I often feel pulled in many directions with things I’m interested in doing but not currently doing – so many that I end up not doing anything. You’ve helped me frame the problem in a new way: Instead of wishing you could do something, do it, see if you are any good at it, and see if you enjoy it. If not, move on.

Ozzy, Thank you so much for your comments. They have really helped to clarify feelings I have had about life and ones community. I really agree with your argument that the transition of people from rural to urban life did weaken the “sense” of community people had.

Having lived in a small family farming community, and in several big cities, I found that the “sense” of community I had on the family farm was greater than what what was immediately available in a big city. However, through developing friendships in the city, I feel like I have regained a portion of that “sense” of community again.

Living on the farm, the family (4 in total, plus 3-5 helpers) always had breakfast and lunch together. Everyday, we worked and spent leisure time together. As well, we had lots of contact with other farmers and neighbors, whom we saw daily. Having communal memories and a shared history was something that made that experience so rewarding and memorable.

Living on this farm, the individual did not have a choice to participate or not to participate in the community. Meals were obligatory, as was the hour of rest mid-day. There was a structure to the day that framed your life and provided a lot of emotional support. The “media” on the farm was focused on your relationships together, the work that had to get done, and personal/communal leisure time.

The farm was like an organism, where every individual was responsible for part of the whole. Like this, there wasn’t much time to feel “lost, restless or shiftless,” and since much of the emotional and physical needs are met in farm life, for people with a compatible personality (one that enjoys working hard, and routine), it can be a highly satisfying and personally rewarding lifestyle.

On the other hand, in a big city, most people do not work with their families, and many people live far from relatives. Thus, city life puts more pressure on you to develop friendships to fill these familial gaps. In the city, people do have the choice to participate or not to participate in the community, and many do live a more individualistic lifestyle.

While a farm will struggle without your participation, an individual can remain largely anonymous in a city. Farms give ample opportunity for deep relationships to develop. People will get to know your inner life, however, in a city, the amount of opportunity for this to happen is greatly reduced. In a city, this “sense” of community will take a really long time to develop, if at all, and is wholly dependent on your ability to develop close friendships. It’s understandable why people in the city fill their lives with “media” as their personal needs on an interpersonal emotional basis aren’t being met daily. Meaningful social interaction and doing things your passionate about seem to be the best help to rid myself of that, “what am I doing with my life feeling”….

Now, living in a big city, while it’s impossible to have the “sense” of community I had on the farm, by forging deep friendships, I’m finding that “sense” coming back.

First, leisure time did NOT increase with the coming of the industrial revolution, it decreased – it was only after many years of industrialization when working hours were limited by law, and even then the ‘extra’ leisure time had to conform to factory hours. Thus, it was not a matter of suddenly having a lot of leisure time on one’s hands that ’caused’ the problem – this is a myth not supported by research into how workers actually spent their time in the pre-industrial revolution periods.

What *did* change mightily was that, in the move from rural to urban, the sense of *community* was diluted tremendously. In pre-industrial times, leisure time was spent in the company of one’s family, one’s friends, one’s community members, along with the attendant shared memories and shared stories. Those shared memories and stories – this undergirding of the sense of community – started going away when those who shared them moved to the cities, which not only offered less community than in rural areas, but also led to deterioration of the community in those rural areas as well, especially since young people began leaving to live permanently in the cities.

Absent a strong sense of community, then, it’s mush more difficult for people to resist the effects of media saturation, and all that follows, that the author correctly notes as problematic. But this means that the cure takes a different shape, at least to some degree, than what it give here. The cure given here is helpful – but consists of treating the *symptoms*. The cure of the *cause* would require a regeneration of a traditional sense of community that is so abundantly lacking today, and not only because of the anti-community aspects of industrialization, but also because of policies which have either degraded or destroyed most of America’s communities. Chief among those policies have been wars – WW1 and WW2 both ripped out the guts of communities which had withstood, to some degree, the industrial revolution’s depredations, via conscription of the young men who represented the continuity necessary for community. Too many never returned, or else returned too badly broken to serve in the roles required.

A serious analysis of this issue will reveal that, for over a century, we have witnessed a wholesale war on the community – both foreign (warfare) and domestic policies (welfare) have seemingly been expressly designed to undermine the sense of community across the nation. Industrial agriculture – which has decimated family farming and sent ever more young people fleeing to cities – is yet another example of these types of policies.

So while the advice the author gives is good as far as it goes for individuals, we should be aware that far more deeply entrenched issues are in play, and therefore that far more thoughtful and far-ranging solutions will be needed to ‘cure’ the problem at a societal level.

I realized this when I went to community college. I was never thrilled to be at my high-school, but because it was a college-prep school and I had good grades, I was tracked to go to a 4 year college. Seeing everybody go “What?????” when I decided to go to community college was pretty interesting. I knew it was the right place for what I wanted to do, but everybody else went crazy (except my parents, they were cool, which was very helpful).

I think the act of deciding what you want to do and cutting out all alternatives is a pretty drastic thing, however I think it is necessary to over come this phenomenon. Certainly helped clear my life up.

Anyway, I just found this site, and i’d like to say again, great article.

These words probably are the most honest words i have ever read. Thank you!

You mentioned parents “coddling” their children. If our case, our father taught us that if you wanted something done right, do it yourself. Because of which, I’ve become an avid handyman, able to repair or renovate just about anything in my home. I know my limitations and call in the pros when needed. (I don’t do roofs or drywall…hey, that mudding and taping is an art form!) I enjoyed this article as it helped define what’s been plaguing me over the years and really helped me think about it. There are two ways that I seek to calm by “collection of hobbies”. One is to put a definition on my anxieties. I define it as just that, I’m a proud “collector of hobbies”. That helps me package it all up in a way that makes sense for me. I don’t have to worry about flitting from one interest to the next. I still get to experience what interests me. The other is that a while ago, I decided that life IS really short. For 4 (or more) years most study in college for what they’re going to do for the next 40+ years. That seems really strange to me, and as a college grad, I wonder if at age 20 I made the right choice? I decided a few years ago that I would try to learn something new for a year. Just a year – that way when I want to move on to something else, it’s not quitting, it’s “experiencing life”. I figure that I’ve got 30+ years ahead of me to learn 30 new things. Even IF I devoted 365 days, (or being realistic…and hour or two a night…or 52 Saturdays) that’s a lot of time to learn a new interest. I’ve blown glass and made neon art, played many instruments (including bagpipes), and learned how to do stained glass. I’m currently trying my hand at teaching myself Japanese (which may lead to blacksmithing next year). There are a few things that I’ll continue to do, like I said, I’ve always been an avid handyman and I’ve been brewing beer for over 14 years, that won’t stop. My hobbies seem to always centered around using my hands, yet my “day job” is sitting behind a desk. I think that if you take a bite out of life (not trying to swallow it all at once) it can lead to a fulfilling life. The downside to this is that I know how to do many, many things, but I am an expert at nothing. I think the worst thing you can do in life is not to do anything – that’s the only time you fail. You never fail if you try…you just experience life’s offerings.