I have always found I don’t take critism well, I never argue I just mull over it for weeks and get depressed and hope I forget.

Myself and my flatemate/friend have just come back from having a couple of drinks (not loads, but a few to be tipsy anyway he critised me over part of my personality. Over something he thinks I do and although he said it doesn’t bother him too much (well it obviously does if he mentioned it) I hate that fact he said that, I didn’t argue, but now I sit here upset thinking about it and wish he didn’t think that of me, wether is true or not, id hope its not true.

So now I can’t help thinking about how he percieves a part of me that I don’t like, Im really really really really depressed about it and don’t know what to do.

And most of all, to have it mean anything, the receiver needs to respect you. For the giver, there’s shooting straight, not in and of itself a always a bad thing depending on who is being criticized, and then there’s berating, losing your temper, and making the other person feel stupid in how yu respond and in your tone of voice, both in criticizing and in general. This Gordon Ramsay crap is a joke – anyone who would act like that or subject themself to that needs to develop self respect.

I will never accept the criticism of someone I don’t respect – period. I may start to think it’s valid, but I won’t act on it – I’ll wait to hear it from someone whom I do respect – that way I know it’s coming from the right motives. To do so, or worse, be the person that criticizes as such, is unmanly in every sense of the word.

Thanks!

But I was wondering, what about in the case that there’s an argument involving you and someone else, but then you realize that the person wants to accuse you of something that you didn’t do when it was actually their fault.

I’m also curious about other prickly situations such as: whenever someone is (or attempting to) blackmail you.

Thank you

Write down every point. You can go back to your office or desk and crumble up the piece of paper, but it does two things.
1. It makes the other person think you’re really taking it seriously. Maybe you’re not, but that’s not the point.
2. It keeps you too busy to start yelling back. It keeps emotions in check by keeping you analytical rather than emotional.

This seems so backwards im actually offended.

Who are you to be able to judge people based on their ‘track record’. And why did u need to say that phrase twice in your response? It reminds me of some sort of low grade, name dropping tactic. There are no reputations online. Does a ‘track record’ determine a persons worth? What about young people or people from a more humbling social situation? Do these people hold no value?

I believe you are an ass.

It sounds as though you believe the value of criticism or communication to be in the source rather than the message. You say that if you don’t know the person and if they don’t have a good ‘track record’, then his criticism counts for little. Do you walk through life with your eyes closed and your ears shut? Value in life comes from all angles and sources. It is this knowledge that truly seperates the achievers from people who merely think they know something.

Lastly, since when do you need to earn the right to criticize? Do you think your more important than everyone else? Are people lucky to hold your audience? Over 300 hundred years ago Voltaire said that even though he doesn’t agree with what you may say, he would defend to the death your right to say it. His thoughts were the basis of the French and later the American revolution. Free speech and responsible government are the foundations of todays democratic societies and without open criticism, these qualities would not exist.

If the world ran by your clock, i think we would run the risk of choking on inflated egos and a thick cover of pretentiousness. Grow a sack and reply you clown.

Dear Dave. You responded to the article by outlining the merits of who you would accept criticism from.

This seems so backwards im actually offended.

Who are you to be able to judge people based on their ‘track record’. And why did u need to say that phrase twice in your response? It reminds me of some sort of low grade, name dropping tactic. There are no reputations online. Does a ‘track record’ determine a persons worth? What about young people or people from a more humbling social situation? Do these people hold no value?

I believe you are an ass.

It sounds as though you believe the value of criticism or communication to be in the source rather than the message. You say that if you don’t know the person and if they don’t have a good ‘track record’, then his criticism counts for little. Do you walk through life with your eyes closed and your ears shut? Value in life comes from all angles and sources. It is this knowledge that truly seperates the achievers from people who merely think they know something.

Lastly, since when do you need to earn the right to criticize? Do you think your more important than everyone else? Are people lucky to hold your audience? Over 300 hundred years ago Voltaire said that even though he doesn’t agree with what you may say, he would defend to the death your right to say it. His thoughts were the basis of the French and later the American revolution. Free speech and responsible government are the foundations of todays democratic societies and without open criticism, these qualities would not exist.

If the world ran by your clock, i think we would run the risk of choking on inflated egos and a thick cover of pretentiousness. Grow a sack and reply you clown.