This post was mentioned on Twitter by altvirtual: Man hug How to ?? LMAO http://bit.ly/ADWUS…

When I was a kid, and someone said ‘boys don’t do (whatever)’, I would reply: ‘I’m a boy. I do it. Therefore, boys do it.’ I haven’t changed my view on that…

And for the slams on the Victorians, photographic and literary evidence of the period suggest that men often had very close friendships and weren’t shy in their displays of affection or somehow afraid of each other’s bodies like so many are today. Because society was so gender-segregated (outside of the home), male bonding wasn’t an issue–it was how things were done. It wasn’t until after WWII that for some reason I still have figure out, that men became more insecure about their masculinity and I guess homophobic and stopped hugging as much, etc.; perhaps the increased talk about homosexuality by then and how Freud turned it from a behavior into an identity is part of the mindset shift in how guys started to relate to one another in public. But it seems like the current younger generation of men (at least where I live) are much more affectionate w/each other than even when I grew up (in the 1980s), and they don’t seem to stess out and overthink this stuff as much.

AND: Come on, people, lighten up! These aren’t “the Rules”. But seriously, though. I don’t have an 8 pack. Harley isn’t about to recruit me for their next tricked out chrome machine. I’m thin but with a noticeable beer gut (and 6′8″, it can be comical). But a man hug feels like a hug from a MAN! And when you hug a woman, you demure in a chivalrous way. And then there’s the other aspect: I don’t want a man’s body pressed against mine. Sorry. BUT, the fact is, if you hug – no matter how you do it, SOMEONE will have something to complain about……. And that goes with the territory. It’s like the handshake. Some men pull away and shake their hand with an “ow”. Some men grip harder. I enjoy that. You learn a lot from a handshake – and a hug is an extended handshake – it says “look, I don’t have a gun tucked in my back belt ready to blast, but I don’t have one in my coat pocket either.”
Remember, in the olden times – which means history before the modern age of paranoia – a man always carried some kind of weapon. If you were talking to someone and they reached into the inner breast pocket of their coat, you would have a moment. – many policeman still do. When you man hug, you know that the weapon is not ready for surprise slinging (real men wore their weapons out in the open) in a cowardly Judas-like move. Many a great man died due to such betrayals…
I find that I get along more with men that adjust their grip tighter when I grip tight. (But, a gentleman *always* lets go when he notices pain in his shakees eye.)
I did enjoy the “I guess I’m different” comment. I *know* I’m different, and I think a real man can accept the uniqueness of other men. BUT, under all that, we are still MEN. It was, for me, as I said in another comment, nearly instinctual.
(I should state for the record, that the problem these days re:weapons is that we suffer from a preponderance of frightened cowards that pretend to be men soley because they have muscles and hence at least some power.)

AND: Come on, people, lighten up! These aren’t “the Rules”. But seriously, though. I don’t have an 8 pack. Harley isn’t about to recruit me for their next tricked out chrome machine. I’m thin but with a noticeable beer gut (and 6′8″, it can be comical). But a man hug feels like a hug from a MAN! And when you hug a woman, you demure in a chivalrous way. And then there’s the other aspect: I don’t want a man’s body pressed against mine. Sorry. BUT, the fact is, if you hug – no matter how you do it, SOMEONE will have something to complain about……. And that goes with the territory. It’s like the handshake. Some men pull away and shake their hand with an “ow”. Some men grip harder. I enjoy that. You learn a lot from a handshake – and a hug is an extended handshake – it says “look, I don’t have a gun tucked in my back belt ready to blast, but I don’t have one in my coat pocket either.”
Remember, in the olden times – which means history before the modern age of paranoia – a man always carried some kind of weapon. If you were talking to someone and they reached into the inner breast pocket of their coat, you would have a moment. – many policeman still do. When you man hug, you know that the weapon is not ready for surprise slinging (real men wore their weapons out in the open) in a cowardly Judas-like move. Many a great man died due to such betrayals…
I find that I get along more with men that adjust their grip tighter when I grip tight. (But, a gentleman *always* lets go when he notices pain in his shakees eye.)
I did enjoy the “I guess I’m different” comment. I *know* I’m different, and I think a real man can accept the uniqueness of other men. BUT, under all that, we are still MEN. It was, for me, as I said in another comment, nearly instinctual.